Thursday, November 12, 2009

I coulda been a math teacher!

Here I was thinking that it was a good thing I had never decided to homeschool my older two children. After all, I'm not a math whiz. There's no way I would even attempt to teach a Calculus course. I don't know anything about a matrix (unless it involves Keanu Reeves) and I'm really not sure of the difference between a hyperbola and a hyperbole. I will readily admit that it took me two tries to pass Algebra II in high school. Clearly, my older children got their mathematical abilities from someone else in the gene pool.

Darling Daughter came home fretting about her Pre-Cal project that was due today, and asked her poor math-challenged mother to assist.

"Of course, I'll help you, dear."

And then she starts spouting off nonsense about how her project had to include 24 conicals and 4 non-conicals, ellipses, arcs, vertex, cortex, latex, subtext and Playtex...and she lost me.

Yeah, right. Tell you what, sweetie, we'll pin your big brother down and make HIM help you.

Imagine my surprise when she informed me that her project was to create a PICTURE. A picture of, like, whatever she wanted. As long as it had shapes and lines and curves and stuff.


Well alrighty then, I can do THAT! Go grab the crayons, baby girl, and Mommy will color a purty picture for your teacher!

Had I known that teaching Pre-Cal was as simple as assigning a bunch of teenagers an art project...had I known that all I had to do was grade who did the best job of recreating Finding Nemo...well, life may have taken a different turn indeed!

On the other hand...I'm kind of glad I didn't know!


a Tonggu Momma said...

I had to go back and read... because I stopped reading at the conicals and non-conicals part (since my brain hurt), but then Nemo looked so cute, I needed to hear more.

Hezra said...

vertex to playtex. I think you covered the teen math thing just right. lol and may I just say, I am so sick of feeling like Dory!